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Signs a Restaurant Isn't Going to Make It | "Sandwich of the Moth" is not a typo. "Yeah, we call it 'bleu bread.'" The theme of Pastime is "Great American Ballpark Food, but in Milkshake Form." "Which one of you whiners wanted the clean utensils?" Write a negative review and suddenly your dog disappears. Robert Irvine just chose it to feature on the next episode of Food Network's "Robert Irvine Ridicules You Mercilessly While Dancing on the Still-Burning Ashes of Your Catastrophically Failed Restaurant." Today's Soup of the Day is yesterday's fryer oil. "We call it Mon-Can. You know, like Tex-Mex but for Montana and Canada." Before taking your order, the waiter has you sign a liability waiver. The sesame seeds on your bun are moving. The mashed potatoes and gravy were great. The turkey and gravy were passable. But the key lime pie and gravy can go fuck itself.

Signs a Restaurant Isn't Going to Make It | Selected from 86 submissions sent in by 34 contributors. Credits: "Sandwich of the Moth" is not a typo. (Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA) "Yeah, we call it 'bleu bread.'" (Nathan C. Sherman, Bellevue, WA) The theme of Pastime is "Great American Ballpark Food, but in Milkshake Form." (Jeremy Shelley, Possum Trot, KY) "Which one of you whiners wanted the clean utensils?" (Allan Rousselle, Redmond, WA) Write a negative review and suddenly your dog disappears. (Barb McPhee, Ann Arbor, MI) Robert Irvine decided to feature on the Food Network show "Robert Irvine Ridicules You Mercilessly While Dancing on the Still-Burning Ashes of Your Catastrophically Failed Restaurant." (Jeffrey Anbinder, Brooklyn, NY) Today's Soup of the Day is yesterday's fryer oil. (Josh Sinnett, Bellingham, WA) "We call it Mon-Can. You know, like Tex-Mex but for Montana and Canada." (Doug Finney, Houston, TX) Before taking your order, the waiter has you sign a liability waiver. (Glenn Marcus, Washington, DC) The sesame seeds on your bun are moving. (Elliott Schiff, Allentown, PA) The mashed potatoes and gravy were great. The turkey and gravy were passable. But the key lime pie and gravy can go fuck itself. (Carl Knorr, Schaumburg, IL)

Top5 for 8/30/23

Chris White

Aug 30, 2023

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